There are few things out there more grossly entertaining than feuding musicians, the extent in which they’ll go to ridicule one another knowing no end. It’s great theater that – unless your name is 50 Cent – it just can’t be scripted.
In recent news the ever-shaky Mariah Carey came unhinged yet again and blasted her ex beau Nick Cannon for his apparent infidelity. She was covering Billie Holiday’s “Don’t Explain” and changed the lyrics from “And I know you cheat/Right or wrong, don’t matter” to “I know you cheated, motherfucker.”
Not very subtle on her part, but then again moments like this don’t call for subtlety. Besides, what good would these moments be if we couldn’t get lost in the drama of it all. It was so enthralling that it inspired us to dig up a few of our most favorite musical showdowns. From classic Tupac, to the very recent Mark Kozelek vs. The War on Drugs “suck my cock” oddity, here’s to the few, the mighty, the ones who don’t know the meaning of “keep it clean.”
Canibus – ‘Second Round K.O.‘
Easily one of the most disappointing rap albums of all time, Can-I-Bus (or more like Can-I-Bust) featured one highlight, the scathing “Second Round K.O.” It was a blistering shot at LL Cool J, who he originally beefed with on “4,3,2,1.” The song features none other than Mike Tyson, who was at the height of his ability, and the perfect accompaniment to a song that throws, and lands, one jawbreaking haymaker after another: [LISTEN]
Marvin Gaye – ‘You Can Leave, But it’s Going to Cost You‘
A very public divorce that set Marvin Gaye on fire, both emotionally and creatively. The whole premise of Here, My Dear was to pay alimony to his then wife songwriter and composer Anna Gordy (older sister to Barry) who a sought a divorce citing “irreconcilable differences,” which essentially means dude was cheating. The album was dogged, but later reexamined and heralded as a classic. And it’s not hard to see why. Marvin lived by his ideals and this is him venting while still trying to hold to them as tightly as ever: [LISTEN]
Tupac – ‘Hit ‘Em Up‘
Every year it seems like there’s a reason to bring up the Tupac and Biggie feud, and while it’s an outright tragedy it should never be overlooked because of the type of cautionary tale it is. It all boiled down to greed, money and power with jealousy being the fuel that turned an ember into a raging inferno. Biggie said this, Tupac said that – all of it a misunderstanding that ended in an epic clash of egos. Tupac sunk his teeth in deep with this one, getting up close and personal, a total waste of breath if you think about it: [LISTEN]
Katy Perry – ‘Ur So Gay‘
This one makes the cut because of the numskulls involved, Katy Perry and John Mayer – both egomaniacal warthogs who have the collective sensibility of a rotting tree stump. The two, who look like one of those brother/sister couples, really went into each other after the split. But it was Perry who showed just how weak and unstable she is by switching up the words to “Ur So Gay” from “I can’t believe I fell in love with someone that wears more makeup, and…” to “I can’t believe I fell in love with John Mayer:” [LISTEN]
Mark Kozelek – ‘War On Drugs: Suck my Cock‘
A real crowning achievement here, one that started after a bit of bleed over from a set that was probably cranked a little louder than it needed to be. Mark Kozelek being the cup of sunshine he is responded to the War on Drugs with not only an onstage rant, but an apology letter that did just about everything except for apologize. It’s a passive aggressive noodle-arm slap, that is equal parts hilarious and pathetic. Cooler heads will likely prevail, but it still won’t stop people from repeating this chorus until the end of time: [LISTEN]
