We like to party
Dancing with Molly
Doing whatever we want
These were the Miley Cyrus lyrics found in texts between a couple pilots stationed at Laughlin Air Force base in Texas, reminiscing about some Las Vegas shenanigans they shared many moons back via Cyrus’ obnoxious sorry-not-sorry-for-partying pop nugget, “We Can’t Stop.” This sparked an illegal search of all their texts, where the following (sarcastic) quote ended with both pilots losing their legal right to fly:
Pilot 1: “You got that molly?” / Pilot 2: “You know what it is”
Both pilots have passed all their drug tests, and there’s zero evidence that the latter drug-referencing text exchange — occurring on the way to a barbecue — is anything but satirical, perhaps making light of how laidback and non-rave-y said barbecue would be.
How adults in very important positions of authority continue to fail to understand satire is baffling. Or the phrase “innocent until proven guilty?” Haven’t we legally decided many times that posting lyrics such as this isn’t a statement of guilt?
Yes, we have. Which is why a second investigation has launched to decide just how poorly this case has been handled. The original allegations have stalled the careers of the pilots, making them unable to fly, and therefore losing their competitive edges in further missions as well as later, commercial flying careers.
Perhaps out of sheer laziness, “guilty until proven innocent” applies here instead of conventional wisdom. The Air Force decided to reprimand three of the four officers without a hearing, probably because they didn’t want to spend the entire two hours that the first guy took to disprove the evidence.
What’s even more bothersome is that this whole spiral began to spin out of an investigation into the alleged “inappropriate relationship” one of said officers maintained with a student. Or rather, the bothersome part is that that entire first case was brushed away while these men’s careers were harmed irreparably for tossing the word “molly” about in private texts.
Maybe the exact nature of this “inappropriate relationship” between a subordinate and authority figure is worth examining, at least enough to make sure no one was exploited or traumatized.
And maybe, just maybe, that’s more important than some pilots’ taste in party lyrics.
