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A screenshot from Screen Junkies’ ‘Honest Trailers’ spin on Disney’s 1991 animate classic, ‘Beauty and the Beast’; Photo: YouTube/Disney/Screen Junkies


Disney’s Beauty and the Beast is being graced with a live-action remake starring Emma Watson and Dan Stevens that premieres this weekend.

Whether this evokes fond memories of for the 1991 provincial town sing-fest or not — The Atlantic is not impressed with the ‘Tale as Old as Time, Told Worse‘, so far — Disney is definitely hedging its billions of dollars on nostalgia, at least, while also not backing down — hell yeah, Disney! — from a homophobic kickback from the studios’ first ‘gay scene’, in which main French bro Gaston’s sidekick supposedly makes his sexuality overt.

That’s another story, though — but relevant in Disney’s 21st century progress, as the mock-trailer team over at Screen Junkies‘ gives the ’91 classic the topical humor treatment here, that if anything, will show you how far the silver-screen behemoth has come in relation to some of the misogynist, anti-semitic shots fired against its enigmatic owner and empire’s creative process.

The hilarious video recasts the plot to show the common-sense inconsistencies that we let slide because well, it is a children’s movie and a fairy tale after all, right? Stockholm-syndrome tendencies, the absence of French accents among the villagers, y’all remember this in the OG fairy tale, right?

Culminating in a recasting of lyrics and titles for many songs of the movie, the Screen Junkies are operating at a Clickhole level of subversive genius, here, as seen on the “Toxic Relationship Song,” which flips the verse and melody on the 1991 ‘tale as old as time’ title track to offer a different perspective:

Cut her off from friends
And her family,
Throw her in a cage
Fly into a rage
Unpredictably
She can’t get away
She can’t be released
She’s in constant fear
‘Cause she’s trapped in there
Please call the police

But don’t take us on our word, watch the video yourself below and add to your day with a cackle and a jab at one of your old childhood favorites: