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Jeff Dunham - I Hate Christmas Lyrics

Artist: Jeff Dunham

Album: Don't Come Home For Christmas

Genre: Comedy

I hate Christmas, Christmas in Hollywood. No one gives you fruit cakes, there's no carolers in the yard, the only fruit cakes I've seen are on Sunset Boulevard.

I hate Christmas stuck out here in Tinsel Town. Forget about White Christmas cause here it never snows except the real expensive kind those cooks put up their nose. What happened to the Christmas I knew when I was young, we'd search the woods and cut down our own tree. Everyone would smile when you pass them on the street, here a stranger drives by and shoots you in the knee.

I hate Christmas stuck out here in LaLa Land. I haven't met a woman here who's boobs aren't big and fake, they never move or jiggle when we have a big earthquake. The weather never changes here through winter, spring, and fall but I guess a Hollywood Christmas is better than no Christmas at all.

Merry Christmas morons! As for Hanakkah ha I don't care. And you Athias your idiots, seriously. Have a nice day!


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