- Songwriters: Peter Edward Baker, M Taylor
Pressed rat and warthog, closed down their shop
They didn't want to, it was all they had got
Selling atonal apples, amplified heat
And pressed rat's collection of dog legs and feet
Sadly they left, telling no one goodbye
Pressed rat, wore red jodhpurs, warthog a striped tie
Between them, they carried a three-legged sack
Went straight on 'round the corner and never came back
Pressed rat and warthog, closed down their shop
The bad captain Madman had told them to stop
Selling atonal apples, amplified heat
And pressed rat's collection of dog legs and feet
The bad captain Madman had ordered their fate
He laughed and stomped off with a nautical gate
The gate turned into a deroga tree
And his peg leg got woodworm and broke into three
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