Ben Folds - Levi Johnston's Blues Lyrics

Woke up this morning, what do I see?
Three thousand cameras pointed at me.
Dude says, "You Levi?"
I'm like, "Yes, that's me sir."
"Well, you just knocked up the VP nominee's daughter."

So I tell him, "No, you got it wrong, mister,
"Already got a girl, and her name is Bristol."
And they all laugh and say, "Where you been, sonny?
"Your mother-in-law's a heartbeat from the presidency."

And I say, "Mother-in-law? No -- we ain't getting married!"
They say, "Soon you will, boy; they just announced it."
I get on my dirt bike and ride to my girl's home,
Gonna lay down the law
And tell her what's going on:

I'm a fucking redneck,
I like to hang out with the boys, play some hockey, do some fishing
And kill some moose.
I like to shoot the shit, do some chilling I guess,
You fuck with me and I kick your ass.

So we talk and it turns out we don't believe in abortion
And sex outside marriage is against our religion.
And when I try to tell 'em I'm eighteen years old,
They say, "Levi, it's too late,
"You gotta do as you're told."

So I say, "Mother-in-law? No -- we ain't getting married!"
They say, "Soon you will, boy; she just announced it."
I get on my dirt bike and ride to my girl's home,
Gonna lay down the law
And tell her what's going on:

I'm a fucking redneck,
I like to hang out with the boys, play some hockey, do some fishing
And kill some moose.
I like to shoot the shit, do some chilling I guess,
You fuck with me and I kick your ass.

(instrumental)

I'm a fucking redneck,
I like to hang out with the boys, get on my snowboard, do some fishing
And kill some moose.
I like to shoot the shit, do some chilling I guess,
You fuck with me and I kick your ass.

I like to do some shit, do some chillin' I guess
... Kill some moose